Seeing, Hearing and Including Women at Church

Leaders of the LDS Church have repeatedly taught that women and men are equal, but not identical. For example, Elder Oaks recently said, “In the eyes of God, … women and men are equal, with different responsibilities.” Similarly, Elder Ballard recently said that “men and women have different but equally valued roles.”

Many LDS Church members accept the premise that God’s definition of “equality” means something other than “sameness.” However, does that mean that everything in the LDS Church today is exactly the way it should be with respect to the treatment of women? In other words, even if “equality” means something different to God than it means in modern secular culture, are current Church practices fully consistent with God’s definition of “equality”?

I can’t say that I have a firm conviction that they are. This is one of the reasons why I think Neylan McBaine’s recent book, Women at Church: Magnifying LDS Women’s Local Impact, is so important.

McBaine is not an extremist by an means. She is not, for example, advocating for women’s ordination to the priesthood; she clearly states that “[t]his book is not an attempt to challenge or redefine gender doctrine.” But McBaine believes that even “accepting the doctrine and policies we have in place in the Church today,” “there is much more we can do to see, hear, and include women at church.”

I believe there are at least two types of LDS Church members who would greatly benefit from reading this book:

(1) those who have difficulty understanding why some LDS women are unhappy with the way they are treated in the Church; and

(2) those who aren’t comfortable publicly expressing support for some manifestations of Mormon feminist activism (e.g., Ordain Women), but who nonetheless believe there are problems and would like to see improvements in the way that women are treated in the Church.

The first half of the book is more or less addressed to those in category (1), and McBaine does an excellent job explaining the issues in a non-threatening way. If her explanations aren’t enough to convince someone that there are legitimate concerns about the role of women in the Church, then I doubt anything will.

The second half of the book is addressed to people, like me, who find themselves squarely in category (2). It includes a variety of suggestions for how we can provide women with “greater inclusion, visibility, acceptance, and voice within the Church.” Many of the suggestions correspond to practices that have already been adopted in some wards and stakes. As part of McBaine’s commitment to work within the current administrative Church structure, all of the suggestions are intended to be consistent with the Church’s publicly available handbook of instructions (i.e., Handbook 2: Administering the Church).

I was impressed by almost all of the suggestions — I kept asking myself, “Why aren’t we already doing this?” — and some of the suggestions will be easy to adopt. For example, one suggestion is for a priesthood holder to always reference his wife when giving a father’s blessing — e.g., say something like, “I’m giving you this blessing in the presence of your mother who joins her faith with mine to work in unity and as an equal partner.” This is a wonderful suggestion, and I am going to do this whenever I give a father’s blessing.

Unfortunately, I suspect that some of the suggestions will meet with resistance from more conservative local leaders. For example, McBaine shared several examples of ways that some wards are trying to make a mother feel acknowledged and involved in baby blessings. Although some of the suggestions shouldn’t be controversial at all (e.g., having the mother sit on the stand during the blessing, asking the mother to bear her testimony right after the blessing), McBaine relates the story of a woman who received permission (albeit reluctantly) from her bishop to hold the baby inside the circle while the baby was blessed by her husband. Personally, I feel like this is perfectly consistent with Handbook 2, which merely states that “only Melchizedek Priesthood holders may participate in naming and blessing children.” Is a woman who holds her baby “participat[ing] in” the blessing (more so than the Aaronic Priesthood holder who holds the microphone)? I think it’s at least debatable, and if it were up to me I would choose to err on the side of greater inclusivity. However, I can certainly imagine that some bishops might feel differently.

Similarly, McBaine suggests that young women should be assigned as visiting teachers. However, when one bishop attempted to do this, he was told by his stake leaders (ironically, the Stake Relief Society President) that assigning young women as visiting teachers is contrary to Handbook 2.

McBaine clearly recognizes that implementing her suggestions won’t always be easy, and she includes practical suggestions for how we can maximize the likelihood of success. Along these lines, I found McBaine’s discussion about how to “establish a safe atmosphere in which to have a weighty conversation” to be particularly useful.

Beyond the specific suggestions contained in the book, I am particularly grateful for the way McBaine encourages Church members to reorient our perspective toward what can be done within the current Church administrative structure. Quoting Clayton Christensen, McBaine challenges the assumption “that obedient Saints are those who follow the programs of the Church assiduously, and that innovation is a symptom of rebellion if it hasn’t been ‘approved.’” Instead, she argues that “[t]he programs of the Church are designed to leave room for a great deal of individual initiative and personal guidance.” McBaine encourages us “to be accountable for [women’s] spiritual needs, … and to do so with imagination, innovation, and uniquely tailored approaches.”

Overall, this book left me feeling quite hopeful. While I sometimes worry about whether my daughters will have a positive experience in the Church, Women at Church reminded me that there are many women (and men) who are working tirelessly to make sure that they will — and gave me some great ideas for things I can do to help.