Life Is A School, Not Merely A Test (And What That Means About Repentance)

(This is a talk that I gave in sacrament meeting yesterday.)

I am going to begin my remarks by sharing two scriptures. The first scripture comes from the Book of Abraham, which describes a pre-mortal council in heaven in which the Lord says, “[W]e will make an earth whereon these may dwell; And we will prove them herewith, to see if they will do all things whatsoever the Lord their God shall command them” (Abraham 3:24–25). According to this scripture, the purpose of this mortal life is to test us to see whether we will do everything that God commands us to do. 

The second scripture comes from the Doctrine and Covenants: “[I]t is not meet that [God] should command in all things; for he that is compelled in all things, the same is a slothful and not a wise servant.” Instead of expecting God to “command in all things,” we are counseled to “be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of [our] own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness” (D&C 58:26–27).

This presents an interesting paradox. The passage in the Book of Abraham suggests that the purpose of life is to see if we will do everything that God tells us to do. But according to the passage in the Doctrine and Covenants, God wants us to do things without his having to tell us what to do.

The way that I make sense of both of these scriptures is to view life as a school — a place “where we learn by having new experiences.” Some of these experiences are related to things that God tells us to do. But we also “explor[e] ideas of our own, and thereby com[e] to recognize the consequences of [our] ideas and actions.” [1]

Testing is an important part of one’s schooling. But it is just one part of a much larger experience. When I think back to my own experiences in school, I remember so much more than tests: dances, concerts, pep rallies, study sessions, plays, elections, football games, and countless other experiences that stretched and molded me in valuable ways. In a similar way, while I believe that tests of obedience are important, I also believe that such tests are just one part of a much broader, richer experience in the school of life.

It makes sense to me why God would want us to “do many things of [our] own free will,” without being told specifically what to do. “A good teacher does not issue orders one after the other and demand assent from her students; a good teacher shows her students how to come to the right conclusions on their own. If God were to [command in all things], God would [be] consigning us to moral immaturity and ignorance.” It would be like giving us “a cheat sheet; … the answers in the back of the book.” It would be a “shortcut … around the processes of moral discernment that are necessary in order to make humans with the potential for moral agency into bona fide moral agents.” It would “remove[] the necessity of the only thing that can make us moral and virtuous people: struggle.” [2] While there would be a certain comfort in having a Divine Being responsible for all important choices in our lives, we would “lose the growth and insight that accompany the stretching and frustration associated with decision making.” [1]

I’ve been asked to speak today about repentance, and I’d like to consider whether the way we view the two scriptures I’ve just shared might affect the way that we view repentance. Some of us might see life primarily in terms of the Abraham scripture — that life is a test to see whether we will obey God’s commandments. From this perspective, we might view repentance merely as a process that should be carried out by someone who has not obeyed God’s commandments. We are taught that this process includes feeling sorrow for our sins, confessing our sins, performing restitution to the extent possible, and forsaking our sins. I believe this is an accurate way to think of repentance. But is it complete? What if we also view life in terms of the Doctrine & Covenants scripture which says that we shouldn’t expect God to “command in all things”? Might this open our minds to a broader, richer view of repentance?

To explore this question, I am first going to discuss two problems that I see with being narrowly focused on testing in the context of a secular school, such as a high school or university. I will then explore whether these problems can teach us something important about our spiritual views on the purpose of life in general and the meaning of repentance in particular.

As we all know, in the context of a secular school, a test is a series of questions or problems that are designed to measure a student’s knowledge or ability with respect to a particular subject. Tests are generally graded. Students who achieve a score above a certain threshold level receive a passing grade, while students who score below the threshold level receive a failing grade. Tests are usually a very important factor in determining a student’s overall grade for a class.

In school, some concepts lend themselves more easily to tests than others. For example, it is easy to test whether a student knows her multiplication facts, or the periodic table of the elements, or when the Declaration of Independence was signed. On the other hand, it is much more difficult to test a student’s intangible character traits — such as her creativity, teamwork, leadership, or her ability to solve complex problems where there are many possible solutions. Generally speaking, tests in school tend to involve concepts where there is a clearly defined answer and little room for interpretation.  

Students who get the most out of their secular educational experience are the ones who focus on learning, regardless of what is going to be tested. However, because tests are an important factor in determining grades, some students may become overly preoccupied with receiving high scores on tests, at the expense of their overall learning. These students tend to narrowly focus their studying on those concepts that can easily be tested — the memorization of facts, the application of rigid rules, the ability to solve problems that have a single correct answer, and so forth. Things that cannot be easily tested — such as creativity, teamwork and leadership — tend to receive less attention.

I understand why students are tempted to focus on concepts that are likely to be tested. But this presents at least two problems. First, some students who receive high grades in school nonetheless lack important skills that are essential to success in the workplace and in life. For example, a recent survey found that over half of employers complained that none or few of their newly hired college graduates were ready for work, “often lacking the key skills of teamwork, determination, communication and punctuality.” [3]

A second problem is that some bright students who are talented in important respects but who lack good test-taking skills may become discouraged. Students who possess skills that employers are looking for may nonetheless see themselves as inferior to other students who lack these important skills but receive higher grades. Such discouragement may cause many bright students to lose hope in their future. Some may even drop out of school altogether.

I believe there’s a spiritual analogy here. Like the concepts we learn in a secular school, some of God’s commandments lend themselves more easily to tests than others. Some of the commandments involve clearly defined rules or standards that leave little or no room for varying interpretation. I will call these “bright-line” commandments, because there is a metaphorical bright line distinguishing behavior that is acceptable from behavior that is unacceptable. However, some commandments are less clearly defined.

For an example of this, let’s consider the Word of Wisdom. The Word of Wisdom tells us that “tobacco … is not good for man” (D&C 89:8). This is a bright-line commandment: smoking cigarettes is clearly against the Word of Wisdom. I have never heard anyone attempt to argue otherwise.

The Word of Wisdom also tells us that “flesh … of beasts and of the fowls of the air … are to be used sparingly” (D&C 89:12). This is not a bright-line commandment. What does “sparingly” mean? There is considerable room for interpretation on this issue. I know many Mormons — myself included — who have a serving of meat with most meals. Is that considered “sparingly”?

(If so, then it’s probably a good thing that the Word of Wisdom doesn’t say that it’s okay to drink alcohol “sparingly.”)

Another example of a bright-line commandment is tithing. Paying tithing involves giving one-tenth of one’s income to the church. Not everyone agrees about whether the one-tenth is calculated from gross or net income, but other than that, there isn’t much room for interpretation about what it means to pay tithing. If you donate one-tenth of your income to the church, you’re a full tithe-payer; otherwise, you’re not.

In addition to tithing, we are also commanded to fast for two consecutive meals and to pay a monthly fast offering to help care for those in need. However, the payment of fast offerings is not a bright-line commandment. We are counseled to give as generously as we are able. But what does that mean? Some leaders have attempted to make this more of a bright-line commandment by encouraging us to give the amount of money that we would have spent on the meals for which we have fasted. But this still leaves a great deal of room for interpretation. How do we calculate what we would have spent? Is it what we would have spent if we had gone out to La Caille? Or to IHOP? Or to the grocery store?

The commandments become even more open to interpretation when we start talking about Jesus’ admonition to love our neighbor. The scriptures encourage us to “mourn with those that mourn” and “comfort those that stand in need of comfort” (Mosiah 18:9), to “lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees” (D&C 81:5). But these are not bright-line commandments. What does it mean to mourn with someone who mourns? Should we send them a Hallmark card? Should we give them money? Should we take them a casserole? Should we stop by and visit with them? If so, how often? Not only are these questions open to interpretation, the best way to proceed usually depends on the specific circumstances involved.

So, some of the commandments involve bright-line rules, while others do not. Sometimes the scriptures and the modern-day prophets spell out exactly what we should and shouldn’t do, while other times they “teach [us] correct principles, and [we] govern [ourselves].” [4]

I previously talked about how, in a secular school setting, some students may become overly preoccupied with doing well on tests. I suggested that this can lead them to focus on those concepts that can be easily tested (such as the memorization of facts) and neglect aspects of their learning that cannot be easily tested (such as creativity, leadership, and so forth). I believe that something similar can happen with the gospel.

If we see life primarily as a test of our obedience, then it’s natural to want to pass that test. This can lead us to focus on those aspects of the gospel where it’s easy to determine whether we’ve passed or not. In other words, we can become overly preoccupied with those commandments that can be articulated as bright-line rules, at the expense of the commandments that are less clearly defined and more open to interpretation. This can lead to the mistaken — and spiritually damaging — assumption that we do not have anything to repent of as long as we haven’t violated any of the bright-line commandments.

For an example, I think back to my last temple recommend interview. I was asked, “Do you keep the Word of Wisdom?” In my mind, I thought, “Well, I don’t smoke, I don’t drink coffee or tea, I don’t drink alcohol, I don’t take drugs.” So I answered “yes,” and patted myself on the back for having passed this particular test of obedience. The need for repentance never crossed my mind, at least not with respect to the Word of Wisdom.

But the reality is, I have much to repent of when it comes to the Word of Wisdom. I overeat, especially during periods of stress. I don’t eat enough fruits and vegetables. I drink too much diet Coke. I don’t exercise enough, and I don’t get enough sleep. No, I don’t violate any of the bright-line commandments related to the Word of Wisdom, but I still need to repent.

I also previously said that being overly focused on tests in the context of a secular school causes many of our students to lack important skills. I’m concerned that viewing life primarily as a test of obedience may have similar consequences in a gospel context. I’m concerned that it may produce Latter-day Saints who are focused on the bright-line aspects of the gospel (such as avoiding alcohol or paying tithing), but who neglect the aspects of the gospel that aren’t as easy to measure (such as kindness, compassion, and forgiveness). 

Jesus was not pleased with those in his time who became narrowly focused on bright-line commandments. He said, “Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith” (Matthew 23:23).

When we view life primarily as a test of our obedience, we run the risk of reducing the richness, beauty and grandeur of the gospel of Christ to a set of easily measurable, bright-line rules. In contrast, when we view life as a schooling experience, we open ourselves more fully to the abundant opportunities that life presents us to “be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of [our] own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness” (D&C 58:26–27).

I’m also concerned that viewing life primarily as a test of obedience may be discouraging to those who struggle with the bright-line commandments. As I previously said, in the context of a secular school, some students who are talented in many significant respects may nonetheless become discouraged when too much emphasis is placed on good test-taking skills. Similarly, in a gospel context, those who possess many Christ-like attributes but who have difficulty with some of the bright-line rules may become discouraged. They may see themselves as second-class citizens. A Latter-day Saint with a generous heart, a forgiving soul, and a nicotine addiction may see herself as inferior to another Latter-day Saint who has no trouble resisting cigarettes, but who is considerably less generous and less forgiving.

The reality is that we are all in need of repentance — not only those who violate the bright-line commandments. “Repentance is … for everyone, so that [we] may come to know the mind of God and [God’s] eternal perspective.” [5]

It is worth asking where repentance fits within the school paradigm. I encourage you not to view repentance as a kind of detention. Instead, repentance should be seen as an essential part of the schooling experience. In a science laboratory, sometimes the equipment gets dirty and needs to be cleaned. But cleaning out test tubes is not the full extent of the laboratory experience. In a similar way, repentance sometimes includes steps to cleanse ourselves from the effects of sin. But this is not the full extent of what repentance is.

To understand what repentance is, we need to understand the objective of our schooling experience here on earth. Joseph Smith taught that long before the world was formed, “God found himself in the midst of spirits and glory” and wanted these spirits to “have the privilege of advancing like himself.” [6] The Book of Moses declares that God’s “work and … glory [is] to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man” (Moses 1:39). In other words, God desires that we receive the same kind of exalted existence of which he partakes. This life is an “educative and transformative process” in which we are given the “opportunity for further progress in acquiring the virtue and [perfection] that characterize God.” [7] However, “[t]he finite cannot take in the Infinite at a glance,” and so it will take an eternity to fully “explor[e] … the inexhaustible riches of the divine nature as they are progressively unveiled.” [8]

Repentance, therefore, is a never-ending process of evaluating one’s life and asking, How can I more fully emulate the Divine? How can I be a better disciple of Christ? I love the Greek word for repentance — metanoieo. It means “to think in a new or different way.” [9] Thus, “[w]e repent when upon reflection, with a stronger will, clearer insight, or deeper desire” we act more in accordance with our divine nature and potential. Repentance is a “dynamic process of change,” a “continual redefining of ourselves through ever better choices and decisions.” [7]

In those aspects of the gospel where there are bright-line commandments, repentance should involve broadening our thinking to encompass not only the letter of the law, but the spirit of the law as well. For example, in the context of the Word of Wisdom, repentance should involve thinking about ways that we can live a healthier lifestyle. This should include, but not be limited to, the bright-line rules. Even if we follow the bright-line rules perfectly, we are still in need of repentance. There are almost certainly things that we can do to improve.

But if our efforts at repentance are limited to bright-line commandments, we run the risk of “omitt[ing] the weightier matters of the law” (Matthew 23:23), as Jesus warned us against. We should also be “anxiously engaged” with those aspects of the gospel where there are very few bright-line rules: how to love our neighbor, how to have and show compassion for those who suffer, how to provide help for the poor and needy, how to be better stewards of the resources we’ve been given, etc.  

This is not an easy process, because there are very few clear-cut answers. But the purpose of school isn’t to provide the answers; rather, the purpose of school is to teach students how to ask the right questions. I believe that repenting is an eternal process that involves continually asking ourselves probing questions.

Sometimes our repentance should involve asking questions that will help us strengthen relationships with those already in our sphere of influence: What can I do to be a better husband (or wife)? How can I be a better father (or mother)? When should I give my own children bright-line rules, and when should I simply teach them principles? 

Sometimes our repentance should involve asking questions that will help us form new relationships: Who is my neighbor, in the sense that Jesus meant? Does it include people who are significantly different than me? Does it include people who are gay? Or who want nothing to do with the church? How can I show greater love to such people? What if my neighbor doesn’t show love in return?

Sometimes our repentance should involve asking questions that will be prompted by suffering and disappointment. How can I cope with the death of a loved one? How can I learn to trust someone who has previously betrayed that trust? How can I find peace and satisfaction in the gospel if the blessings of marriage or parenthood haven’t been realized?

I believe that asking ourselves difficult questions such as these — and then doing our best to try to answer them, while soliciting God’s help in the process — should be an integral part of our ongoing efforts at repentance.

As long as there is room for improvement in our lives, as long as there is a gulf between us and the Divine, then there is also a need for repentance. This essentially means that there are no limits to our need for repentance. But this also means that there are no limits to our possibilities for learning and growth. As one of our hymns declares:

The works of God continue, And worlds and lives abound;

Improvement and progression Have one eternal round.

There is no end to virtue; There is no end to might;

There is no end to wisdom; There is no end to light.

There is no end to union; There is no end to youth;

There is no end to priesthood; There is no end to truth.

There is no end to glory; There is no end to love;

There is no end to being; There is no death above.

I know that I need to repent, not merely to pass a test of obedience, and not only for those aspects of the gospel where God has given specific commandments. I believe that “[r]epentance is … an ongoing process by which we repudiate [less divine] choices … and [then] choos[e] afresh in accordance with purified desire.” [7] It is my prayer that each of us will be “anxiously engaged” in this great cause of repentance. I express gratitude for the opportunity to repent, and for the Savior’s Atonement which makes repentance possible. 

REFERENCES:

[1] “How Much Tolerance Can We Tolerate?” by Arthur R. Bassett, Sunstone, September 1987.

[2] The Human Faces of God: What Scripture Reveals When It Gets God Wrong (And Why Inerrancy Tries to Hide It), by Thom Stark

[3] “Graduates Unprepared for Employment,” The Independent, 13 September 2013.

[4] Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Joseph Smith.

[5] “Repentance Also Means Rethinking,” by Gary P. Gillum.

[6] “Becoming Like God,” available on lds.org.

[7] The God Who Weeps, by Terryl & Fiona Givens.

[8] Theology in the Context of Science, by J. C. Polkinghorne.

[9] See the lesson notes for this episode of Bible scholar Jared Anderson’s “Engaging Gospel Doctrine” podcast.